Shishigami naruto
by evilcassie01
Summary: Naruto is the forest spirit of Hi no Kuni and is brought into Konoha so he can see how things are in this period Powerful, kyuubiless naruto NaruHarem
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone this is Evilcassie01 here again churning out another story. As all of you know I haven't really updated my story in a while and just so you guys know I am a very sporadic writer some updates will be small and others will be big and updates will come randomly. Not informing you of this is MY BAD so there you've been told. Also could anyone please give me the links to some good English to Japanese translation sites it would be appreciated.

Anyway this is a mainly Naruto story with a slight crossover with Princess Mononoke an absolutely awesome movie if you haven't seen it go watch it. In this naruto will be powerful as he will be in all my stories in some form or another also he will have no Kyuubi sealed in him, but don't worry it will make an appearance. Now I'll need your help due to the fact I don't know whether to make the Kyuubi male or female this will be up to you but this doesn't mean it will be in the pairings. Poll closes for chapter 3.

"speech"

'thought'

"**powerful spirit, demon, summon speech"**

**'powerful spirit, demon, summon thought'**

Now then I don't own Naruto or Princess Mononoke if I did I seriously wouldn't be writing fanfiction now would I.

CHAPTER 1

The great forests outside of Konoha were know for there lushness life as well as for the fact that the Shodiame Hokage grew them using his Mokuton (wood release) techniques in conjunction with his brothers mastery of the water element. Another thing that the forests of Konoha and Hi no kuni (Fire Country) were known for were the Kodama, small tree spirits that were said to be good luck as well as a sign that the forests were healthy if in a large number. It was said that if you ventured deep into the forests that could could hear them as if it were raining.

There was a myth that surrounded the forest that in the deepest depths of the forest, were the oldest tree resides on a small island the Shishigami (Forest Spirit) resided. He was said to be both the giver of life and the taker of life. During the day the Shishigami resembles a great stag with many antlers, bird like feet, and the face of a baboon. At sunset Shishigami becomes Daidarabocchi (nightwalker), A huge God in a humanoid form that appears to be made out of stars with a long, pointed face and tentacles-like spikes on the back. Only the Hokages were to ever know the way to the grove of the Shishigami and it was widely believed the Shodiame got his Mokuton abilities from the Shishigami for his help in defending its grove.

This is how we find the Sandiame Hokage Sarutobi Sasuke as he navigated his way to the grove. He always found it so peaceful there, the air was always clearer and the stars would shine so brightly in the grove. It's waters fresh and its food bountiful it was were he came so just relax and be normal to let his hair down as his student used to say. It was also here that he came for the council of the Shishigami who seemed to be as old as time yet still held his youth, Sarutobi always found him paradoxical in nature.

As dawn broke and the sun set the sky aflame Kodama of all shapes and size came to sing as in greeting to the forest spirit returning to his home. From were the moon shone still Sarutobi could make out the form of the Daidarabocchi as he almost glided back to the opening above the grove. As he descended a great gale settled over the area as each platform of leaves spiralling up the great tree seem to shake as some invisible force stepped upon them to reach the ground. Sarutobi stood in front of the tree as a human shape began to materialise in front of him. As the figure became more corporeal Sasuke decided to have a look at the man know as the Shishigami.

His clothes consisted of midnight blue pants that most shinobi wore although they lacked the various hidden pockets that others had, on them were small white stars that seemed to have an inner glow, on his feet were a pair of wooden zori with a single stilt like base (1). He also wore a deep red hakama top with the front open to show the six-pack he had (think Sasukes from shippuden only a deep red colour) he had an earring on his right ear that resembled a root curled into a circle with a small deep purple and green crystal set into the centre. In his hand was a simple wooden cane with a silver cap on the top also inlaid with curled up root with a crystal in the centre. He had a pipe in his mouth much like Sarutobi and his hair was a golden blonde set into several braids each with a small bit of wood curled around the tips of his hair for each braid. His features were regal as though a descendant of kings and his smile could woo women from teenagers to one foot into the grave. His eyes were a stunning sky blue irises with green on the outer edge that were filled with warm and unfathomable wisdom.

"Aaahh Saru-san if I knew you were coming I would've cleaned up" The forest spirits voice was a deep baritone full of mirth. It was times like this that Sasuke cherished no "yes Hokage-sama" or "yes Sarutobi-sama" it was always informal with Naruto and he thanked him for that. "Maa maa Naruto-kun I just need a break from the paperwork and to relax" Sarutobi reasoned with the man, Naruto just chuckled as said "what is that all I'm good for, just a guy who put you up for a week to get away from the stress, Saru I thought I was more than that." at Sarutobi's embarrassed look Naruto stern face cracked and he howled with laughter "oh god..laugh..your..cough..face hahahahaha..ooo Saru I haven't laughed that hard since you told me of the time you saw the beating Tsunade gave Jiriaya for groping her" with that he cracked up again from the memory while Sasuke just shook his head at the seemingly childish man. No matter how many times they met he never got used to Naruto's personality.

After he calmed down Naruto asked "Oi Saru when are you gonna bring them students of yours with you like you promised it gets lonely here and I ain't got some in an age SO I've decided to come back with you to the village." with that Sasuke choked on his pipe "Na-Naruto your not supposed to leave the forest who will pro"

"I've got that covered I'll pass over protection to the wolf and boar clans besides I haven't stepped foot out of this forest in over 200 years I wanna see what else is out there as well as get laid, you know how long its been since I tapped some eh? 207 years 7 months and 26 days, do you know what that kind of deprivation does to me?" Sarutobi just watched the ranting spirit with a shake of his head whilst all the comments just seemed to wash over him "Ok ok I get it you want sex but can you please drop it if your that desperate we will head off now." as soon as the words left his lips Naruto summoned a large snow white wolf as well as a white four tusked boar "Moro, Okkoto the forest is under your protection while I'm gone do you understand?" both of them bowed and replied "Hai Shishigami-denka"(2) with that he turned on his heel and took a drag on his pipe before exhaling the smoke and smiled at the Hokage "well what are you waiting for Christmas? Lets go Saru" with that Naruto headed off into the forest the way Sarutobi came leaving the aged Hokage with only one thought 'What the hell's Christmas?'

AND CUT

this will be an epic story most likely following the story in the next chapter Naruto goes to Konoha and chaos ensues till next time this is Evilcassie01 signing off

Till next time peeps and R&R OR FEEL THE WRATH OF MALLET-SAMA!!


	2. evil paperwork and scary fangirls

Hello everyone this evilcassie01 back again with chapter number 2, this came to me in a dream which was followed up with being chased by a 10" tall Pepsi bottle for drinking his daughter...interpret that as you will you dirty people.

Anyway kyuubi votes are 3 for female and 0 for male so ill have to dream/think up some good stuff for that, now then for those of you who don't know me which is everyone here I have a very...weird sense of humour. Without going into some long explanation some days I'll think the most random and strangest things are the funniest thing since the carry on films (which by the way I love) and other days my definition of funny is breaking someone till there nothing but a blithering idiot having a nervous breakdown in the nearest corner, so as you can see the humour in this story will change with what I feel is funny at the time. On a final note I thank those 19 people who have reviewed this story and not flaming the holy hell out of this and for "the lost kitsune 4" mallet-sama is the Japanese version of the sledgehammer my uncle used to use in less than legal ways when he didn't get what he wanted...until he was arrested over it so there.

ANYWAY I own neither Naruto or Princess Mononoke and am in no way, shape or form making money from this.

"blah" speech

'blah' thought

"**blah" higher being speech**

**'blah' higher being thought**

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

All Sasuke could do was sigh as he watched a more or less living god act like a five year old who ate too much sugar. It made him always question if the other gods were like this, when asking said question to Naruto all he got as an answer was a blush and a reply of "Kami always throws the best parties" This confused the old man until he wondered into the small den Naruto had in the grove and found a picture that had him almost die from losing too much blood and Naruto laugh his ass off as the watched him fly through a solid rock that was 5" thick. What was on said picture was Naruto with a grin that would put a Cheshire cat to shame as he was surrounded by the most breathtakingly beautiful women Sasuke had the pleasure of seeing. When he asked Naruto who they were all he did was turn the picture over and show the writing on the back which read "lets 'play' again some over time Naru-kun love Kami". For months afterwords all that could be heard from Sasuke was mutterings of 'lucky bastard' and 'Jiraiya would kill himself just to see that'.

As Sasuke came out of his musings he realised he was in sight of Konoha's west gate and Naruto was unusually quiet, but he just put it down to not being out of a forest for 200 years "so the sapling used my wood for the walls and gates eh...Looks great 10 points!" with that he brought out two fold up fans from nowhere with the numbers 10 in red on each and striking a pose eerily similar to Jiraiya. All sasuke could do was ask "what are you on about?" as soon as he said this Naruto was back as he was before, his face serious as though he never posed at all "What I'm talking of Saru is when the sapling or Shodiame as you know him defended my grove he asked for some of my Irontree wood to help in the building of his new village and I'm just admiring the work of it is all"

As they approached the gate they were Halted by the two Chuunin Guards. "Halt state your name an...Ah Hokage-sama, I didn't recognise you for a moment, forgive me for interupting you and your guest" all Sasuke could do was sigh and wave the guard off, he wasn't some sort of monster so why the hell is the so jittery. Well there was that one time he went berserk on a battalion of Iwa-nin in the war when they ripped his one of a kind Icha Icha volume 1 gold edition the first and only one ever hand written by Jiraiya to shreds.

As they both walked down the main road towards the Hokage tower Sasuke noticed, with growing envy and shock, as all the women from sixteen to sixty staring at Naruto with the fangirl hearts above their heads. He could've sworn he saw an Inuzuka being held in a full nelson while a female ANBU had fallen between two buildings straight into a large bin. He also noticed with horror that already a fanclub had been set up labelled 'Hot Blonde with the Old Man Society' or 'H.B.O.M.S'. He and Naruto began to speed up when they noticed the T-Shirts and the large lengths of rope each were holding with the hungry looks in their eyes made them use shunshin the rest of the way.

When they arrived Sasuke was instantly on his knees crying over the several stackes of papers and mourning his wrist while Naruto stood still, the only indicator he was alive was the slight twitch of his lips because he couldn't choose between laughing at Sarutobi's expense, crying over trees being wasted for the paper now on the floor or taking pity on Sasuke and telling him the use of Kage bunshins. After a while Sasuke got out of his depression and revived Naruto who now sat in front of Sasuke, cane propped on the chair leg and arms crossed over his chest wondering why he was keeping him from his 'poon time'. "Now Naruto I know how much you want to go out there and have sex yo-""DAMN RIGHT I DO!""ahem, you have to be registered, due to your unique chakra signature we can't pass you off as a civilian or the council will say your a spy, so I'm going to have to place you as my personal bodyguard just like the Diamyo has his 12 guards of fire (?) do you understand?" all Naruto did was nod if it meant he was out of here faster it was better for him, meant more sex. "GREAT, here's your Hitai-ate and i'll send someone over tomorrow to sign the legal forms" At the mention of more paperwork Sasuke started to cry anew until Naruto said "why not use kage Bunshins? It's easier on the wrist if you do" at this Sasuke froze as his head whipped up so fast Naruto swore he left an afterimage "wha-what did you say?" he hopeful and desperate look on his face wanted Naruto to say he said nothing just to watch his heart break but thought better of it said "why.not.use.kage.bunshins?" as soon as those words felt his mouth Sasuke grinned until it looked like he wouldn't be able to do anything else before he cackled like Orochimaru does when he gets a 'plaything' "HAHA FINALLY TAKE THAT YOU FUCKING BASTARDS KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU...ICHA ICHA AND SAKE HERE I COME YIPPEE!!" all Naruto could do was lean heavily to the side from the massive sweatdrop on the side of his head from Sasuke's outburst as he watched the old man bounce around the office which suddenly as filled with a barrel with all the paperwork set alight inside it with a giant banner over the desk saying "DEATH TO PAPERWORK" he started backing out as he watched Sasuke and 3 kage bunshins doing a rain dance around the thing.

When Naruto finally left the Hokage tower he henge-d into an unassuming brown haired chuunin with green eyes so he wouldn't be hog tied and raped by several women, now he thought about it it wasn't such a bad idea until he remembered a 62 year old woman right at the front of the group and paled while thinking 'so...much...sagging'. After emptying his stomach in a nearby bin he continued down the road until the aroma of food entered his nose and found himself floating towards a small stand called 'Ichiraku Ramen' his drooling doubled at the site of the girl serving the food. She was about five foot seven with brown hair that reached the small of her back, kept out of her flawless face with a bandanna if Naruto had to guess with the baggy kimono she wore on she was a solid C almost D cup. "welcome to Ichiraku Ramen what can I get for you?" her voice left a shiver down his spine and he berated himself for wanting to just jump jump over the counter and screw her brains out without getting to know her. Even though he loved sex more than any other being on earth he at least wanted to know them first he wasn't into those one night stand where you'll never see each other again he wanted to know them at least. So swallowing slightly he said "I'd just like a large miso ramen please miss...?" he raised raised his eyebrows slighty whilst twisting his hand in a circular motion till she answered "Oh my name is Ayame nice to meet you." He smiled slightly which made the newly named Ayame blush as he replied with "the names Naruto a pleasure to meet you" he reached to her hand which was washing the counter and grabbed it, he saw her tense slightly so he brought it to his lips and placed a chaste kiss on the back of her hand which make her blush darken a shade or two. The mood however was broken when Teuchi came from the kitchen with Naruto's ramen and hit him on the back of the hand with a wooden spoon whilst leaking a great amount of Ki (killing intent) for a civilian and saying "I won't be having some random stranger trying to charm my daughter so keep your hands to yourself and release the henge boy." Naruto was again frozen by his brain wanting to laugh at Teuchi for calling him a boy, he was a ma...err great spirit damn it, another wanted to cower from the angry father and another wanted to argue so he just looked around the stall. Seeing no one in he sighed and released the henge causing Ayame and Teuchi to stare and Ayame to start drooling up a river and stutter "yo-you-you're that h-h-hot guy with the Ho-Hok-kage with that Ayame let out a fangirlish squeal and flew backwards from the nosebleed and Teuchi to stare in shock and bow his head and say "Shishigami-sama." Naruto just looked confused for a while but stared pointedly at Teuchi who said "during the second great shinobi war I was on Sandiame Hokage-sama's personal ANBU squad and I got separated from them during an ambush from Iwa-nin and I got lost in the forest I remember falling unconscious and then when I awoke I saw a strange many horned stag heal me with but a touch. The next thing I know I was outside the village gate. When I asked Hokage-sama what that stag was he told me about you and told me to recognise you from the earring you wear." Naruto just nodded while thinking who he was before he clicked his fingers and said "oh I remember you now weren't you the guy with the falcon mask?" at he Teuchi's nod he said "oh yes now I remember you that was a nasty puncture wound you had, reminded me of a time long ago when they had weapon that could do that but to a much higher degree anyway you were lucky I was patrolling that part of the forest or you wouldv'e died." At this Teuchi just smiled and said "sorry about earlier I'm just looking after my daughter you know...hehe no wonder you were henge-d with a face like that you'd be beating back the women with a stick although I don't know why." At this they both imagined, or in Naruto's case reminisced, about being surrounded by beautiful women when Naruto remembered that old fangirl before going deathly pale and going into the corner in the fetal position while saying "Soo...much...sagging" while sobbing. Teuchi wondered what happened until he remembered the old lady that passed by in a Naruto fangirl T-shirt and felt sympathy for him. When Naruto finally finished his now cold ramen he said goodbye to Teuchi and the now awake Ayame with the promise of returning for more ramen which he did wholeheartedly whilst re-applying the Henge.

Still feeling hungry he headed into a place called the 'dingo-dango café and bar' and felt his eyes widen to the size of sake saucers and almost drop the henge in sheer surprise. At the far end of the bar there was at least 100 women with his fan club T-shirts on and a Giant canvas on which were hundreds of ideas on how to capture and subdue him long enough for them to have there dirty way with him. The plans ranging from the ninja fan girls to scour the city and dispel any and all henges and then use the SS-class chakra absorption shackles to make sure he couldn't get away to downright stupid one's such as searching for some legendary rare beetle to grant them a wish. As Naruto wept in a corner he caught sight of something that made him think he was back in heaven, for at the bar sat three of the most exquisite women Naruto had ever seen on the mortal plane, and over his many millennia of life that was a lot. The one closest to him was obviously an ANBU from the ANBU tattoo he could see using his spirit eyes (not doujutsu) she had deep purple hair and dark eyes. She had an unblemished heart-shaped face and was at least five foot nine she was in a black short sleeved shirt and a black skirt that reached the knee with a slit up to each thigh for manoeuvrability and some biker shorts underneath. She had 38C breasts from what Naruto could see and nice legs with a small showing of muscle to accentuate their beauty. Sat next to her was another woman with black hair pulled into a messy bun with a Konoha Hitai-ate on her forehead. She had hazel coloured eyes and a downright sexy and bloodthirsty smirk on her face as she talked animatedly to the final woman. She wore a fishnet bodysuit that reach to just above the knee which showed off her 42D size breasts rather well. The bodysuit was covered with a tan coloured trenchcoat that also reached her knees with a deep orange miniskirt that just reached pass her thighs. She also had shinguards which attached to the normal shinobi footwear. The last woman had untamed black hair that reached her shoulders and a fishnet top with a long red sleeve on the left and none on the right. She wore bandages from the second knuckle to elbow on both arms and wore a battle kimono which looks like large white wraps around her with a large black line down each with teeth like markings coming from the line in random intervals. She also had wraps around both her thighs and wine red yes that were a shade darker around the pupil. Just like her friend she had 42D almost DD breasts and wore her Hitai-ate on her forehead.

Naruto just swallowed the lump in his throat and prayed Kami they were single as he walked up to the bar he noticed each of the women staring at him as he asked for the bartender's strongest drink. When he got it instead of using a sake saucer he reached into one of the pockets of his chuunin vest and took out a shot glass. He placed some sake into the cup and downed it in one, a second later he spit it out and each of the women smirked and thought 'amateur'. But the smirks turned into shocked expressions as he man started shouting at the bartender "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?! PISS WATER I ASKED FOR SOMETHING WITH A DAMN KICK NOT THIS SHIT DONT YOU HAVE ANY WHISKEY?" at the man's confused face Naruto just gave him an incredulous stare and said "please say you do have whiskey?...how about rum?...Vodka?...CIDER?!...OH FOR GODS SAKE ANYTHING OTHER THAN THIS PISS WATER YOU CALL ALCOHOL AND WINE?!" at the man's still confused expression Naruto asked desperately "do you at least have your own brewery?" at the man swelling with pride and nodding Naruto's expression turned downright deadly and said "show me" making each of the women shiver from the commanding aura he now gave off, just like the Sandiame when he was serious. The man just nodded and showed him to a door at the bar end of the counter and opened it. Naruto walked in and shut the door, for a few seconds all was silent until they heard the man cry out in joy and lots of crashes until the door opened and a fog emptied out of the doorway showing Naruto in all his un-henge-d form with several bottles of different colour liquid and hugging the clear one to his face like his long lost children. All the Fangirls heard the commotion and turned and saw the object of their affection in a doorway behind the counter and broke out in a fight over who'll get him first while the three women at the bar stared gob smacked at him each with drool running down their chins or in the case of the fishnet clad one a huge nosebleed while the bartender rushed into the room Naruto just occupied to see if he'll emerge as hot guy just like the chuunin did. As Naruto saw the fangirls in the back had notice him he rushed out of the front door towards the Sarutobi compound hoping to see those three goddesses sometime soon and weeping over the fact that he'll constantly have to dodge fangirls for the rest of the stay here.

AND CUT, PRINT IT!

Wow that's the longest thing I've written for a fanfiction I was gonna draw it out and him meet a few more of the girls but I'm too tired to do it now cos it's 2 in the morning. Now there are three definite in the Harem and that is my fave combo of Anko/Kure/Tsu/Yugao there will be 4-7 other women in this but they range from fuck buddies to actual wives you may say who but at the end of the day it my choice.

In chapter three we'll get properly introduced to Anko Kurenai and Yugao as well as some more women and Naruto is introduced to the hilarity that is D-ranked missions so until then please R & R and this is Evilcassie01 signing out.


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